Diary Of A Screwed Eradicon
by Albedolover185
Summary: This fanfiction stars the great Steve the vehicon and his best friend/berthmate, Wayne the eradicon. These two do their jobs, don't draw attention, so why in the pit have Knock Out and Starscream decided to develop crushes on them! Read Wayne's diary, I mean, data pad entries along with Steve's misadventures. Rating may go up, but we'll see how this goes.
1. Wayne's Data Entry 1

**_Data Pad Entries # 1-2/Flashbacks_**

* * *

**_Data Pad Entry # 1  
_****Date: 4/3/2013  
Subjects: Disaster Averted**

**Disaster Averted**

**To anyone to whom this may concern, this is not that earth custom they call a "diary". I found this data pad shoved behind an old surveillance monitor that needed to be rooted out and scrapped, so I figured, why not take the thing? It could be useful for important things I need to remember or maybe something to throw at ST-3V3, otherwise known as Steve, when he pisses me off again. But this is not a diary, so I won't be going 'dear data pad' this or 'dear data pad' that.**

**But anyways...**

**I was called into the bridge today by Commander Starscream. Look, this has not been said by anyone but...we all know Starscream is going to fail at being a leader. It is just inevitable that he is going to simply either kill himself in the process or make us lose the war. But back to the subject at hand... He called me in to tell me I was going on a mission to scout for energon...but what he didn't tell me was that I was suppose to go with a partner...**

* * *

**_Flashback_**

* * *

_"What does Starscream want with you again exactly?"_

_Steve had decided to walk me to the bridge since it was on his way to the berthroom. He just got back from a mission in, where was it? Hawaii, and told me that he was so drained, that he was surprised that he didn't fall of the side of the road on his way here. I, being the type of friend I was, quickly made wisecracks, earning me a punch in the arm._

_"He wants me to go on a mission to scout energon or something. I don't know why he singled me out when he's got mechs that are more fit for mining, like Breakdown, just sitting around, waiting for something to do," I stated. Starscream could be an idiot at times, but he is an idiot with wrist rockets and not that bad of aim, so I ain't gonna be the one to tell him._

_"Who knows? Hup, this is as far as this mech's going; good luck, my friend." We had reached the door to the bridge, and obviously, Steve did not want to be around with Starscream in there. Turns out, our great commander has a crush on him! Soundwave and I had been eavesdropping, so when we heard Starscream say that, the silent mech made the most appropriate sound effect; a record scratch. Steve now tries to avoid Starscream like he has the cybonic plague, but it kinda backfires on him when I tell him where he's at. ...What? Watching Steve squirm is better than TV!_

_I entered the room only to try and turn on my pede as soon as I saw our medic; the vain and egotistical Knock Out. Okay, so maybe Steve isn't the only one with a problem... Knock Out has been on my aft since I first arrived on Earth, which is why I pray to Primus every time I get sent out to battle the Autobots that I don't get hit. Do you know how awkward it is to get patched up by a dude that flirts with you non-stop on a daily basis?!_

_Thing is, it's gotten worse over the years! It is absolutely getting ridiculous, but I'm scared to say anything because he's the medic! If I piss him off and somehow get hurt, he will not fix me, or I could go to sleep and he could sneak inside and turn me into his own personal dissection experiment! So, I just suck it up and do what anyone would do in my situation: avoid him to the best of my abilities._

_"Get back here!" I winced at Starscream's voice before turning around. He stood next to a smug looking Knock Out, who winked at me. I pursed my lips before looking around the room, trying to figure out what to say. I pointed at Knock Out and opened my mouth to say something, but Starscream raised a clawed hand._

_"Knock Out will be accompanying you on the energon scouting, W Y-N3. And before you even spout some gibberish about needing to be somewhere else, I checked with every single last workforce on the ship, so don't even __**try **__to weasel out of this."_

* * *

**One thing that most cons underestimate about me is how fast I can think up an excuse. Granted, they may not always be the best, but they give me enough time to sneak out of the room while everyone's trying to figure out what the frag I'm talking about. But no, no, my friends! I mustered quite possibly the greatest excuse ever in the history of our vast universe with the greatest performance to back it up.**

* * *

_"Of course, Lord Starscream." They were both surprised by how easy I submitted, but what they didn't see was the smirk I hid when I had bowed. I silently cleared my throat to get the emotion I needed in order for this to work. "Yet, I'd like to find someone to take care of Steve, my lord," I stated. _

_Just as I suspected, that sneer on his face turned into a frown of concern as he obviously wondered what was wrong with my roommate. "ST-3V3? I demand to know what's wrong with him at once!" he commanded, trying to sound tough while looking like a kicked puppy._

_"My good lord, I do not want to pester you with such a trivial matter such as Steve being sick_—_oops," I stated, covering my mouth with a hand. Starscream's face turned so pathetic, I nearly laughed at how stupid he looked. I mean, seriously! If you ever see Starscream sad or scared, you will know what I'm talking about._

_"How did he get sick?" he asked. Knock Out, at this point, looked a mixture of annoyed and jealous as he crossed his arms and huffed in the background._

_"He can't remember. Must be how delirious he's gotten in the hour. Poor mech needed me to walk him to the berthroom, but I had needed to come into the bridge. I sure hope he didn't collapse."_

* * *

**Okay, I don't mean to toot my own horn, but this is some sly acting, and the fact that I thought of this on the fly... You gotta give me props for thinking this up. Though...that last line might have over done it a bit...**

* * *

_"Get your aft to that berthroom and take care of my Steve, or otherwise, I will personally rip out your spark and throw it off the ship!" as he said this, he steadily got closer to my face until I was forced to look_ _him square in the optics. Not having to fake being scared for my aft, I quickly left the room as Knock Out went from surprised, to severely pissed off. When the door closed behind me, I did a fist pump of triumph before walking towards the berthroom._

* * *

**Knock Out had to go with a random drone, but apparently, the drone looked a little too much like Steve for his liking, and he decked the poor dude more than once in the face. And I don't know why, but I've got this nagging sensation at the back of my processor, and I'm pretty sure it ain't a good thing.**

* * *

**_Data Pad Entry #2_****  
Date: 4/6/13  
Subjects: Primus, Help Steve!**

**I should feel like a real piece right now, I gotta tell you. But...This has got to be the greatest day of my ever-loving life-cycle! I still have traces of lubricate when it ran down my face plate at how hard I was laughing today! Remember when I made up that lie about Steve being sick and all? When I told Starscream that he was okay, he pushed past me and basically made a warpath towards our room. I followed after him to see what was going to happen, and I am ****_so _****glad I did...**

* * *

**_Flashback_**

* * *

_"STEVE!"_

_The poor mech was crushed into a hug by Starscream as I tried to hold in my laughter while peeking at the sad scene. Steve saw me and tried to plead for help by extending a hand, but I shook my head. If you were seeing what I was seeing, you wouldn't want to ruin the show either. Steve managed to jar the death grip from his body and gently pushed the seeker away. "WHAT are you doing?!" he questioned._

_"W Y-N3 told me about you being sick. I knew sending you on that mission to Hawaii was a stupid idea, but Knock Out convinced me." Steve had scooted back some as Starscream turned to the side, taking his optics off him. He rapidly tried opening the door, but the buttons were jammed, and he banged his fist against it a couple of times in frustration. When the seeker turned back, he quickly stepped forward to make it seem like he hadn't moved. "But in order to make up for this pure negligence of your well-being, I've personally scheduled you a check-up with Knock Out."_

* * *

**I couldn't stick around because a.) Steve was going to kill me and b.) I couldn't control my laughter for much longer. I ran to the nearest place, which was the bridge, and laughed my aft off. And I swear to Primus that this was quite possibly my biggest stroke of luck. Soundwave was in there, as well...**

* * *

_As I walked to Soundwave, I wiped the lubricate from my face. He turned to face me before playing a clip of my voice. "What goes on?" I smirked and was about to talk when I heard the sound of scrapping and heel struts. I signaled for him to wait as I walked towards the door. I peeked through the window and nearly busted into full hysterics. Starscream was pushing Steve, who was trying to dig his heels into the ground to stop them from pursuing. I ducked back down and laughed silently as they passed._

_"Soundwave?" He looked at me as I devilishly smirked. "Can you hack into the cameras located in the medbay for me?" I asked._

* * *

**Here is the file of what I saw. If anybody finds this, they better be prepared to laugh their afts off... Though, some might find it cruel and mean that I didn't help him...**

* * *

_Steve was forcefully pushed into the medbay by Starscream before the door closed behind him. Knock Out hadn't heard since he was busy rummaging around in a box for something, a medical tool or whatever. Steve took this as a time to try and open the door as quickly as possible, pressing random buttons on the keypad since he didn't know the unlock code. Knock Out began mumbling to himself, still oblivious to the fact that Steve was in the room._

_"No good drone. I need something...frightfully painful for him."_

_Steve's visor turned a dull red before he started frantically typing the buttons, even more so than before. When the keypad didn't work, he shuffled towards the door and looked out through the window before hysterically waving his hands to get the attention of whoever was on the other side of the door. When they obviously didn't come, he flipped them off before heading back to the keypad. Knock Out suddenly brought out a menacing looking drill and activated it. Two smaller drills came from its side before they all started spinning, all three going in a counter-clockwise motion._

_"Hmm... It's what I was looking for, but it needs a companion."_

_Steve just gave up on the keypad at that point and actually tried to pry the door open with his bare servos, straining as silently as possible. His feet slid against the floor until he finally slipped and fell into a large pile of junk. This, obviously, alerted Knock Out. The red mech looked just in time to see Steve in mid-running stance, who turned his head towards him._

_"Steve! ...How long have you been standing there exactly?" he asked, raising an optic ridge._

_"Long enough tooo..."_

* * *

**Now, I gotta pause it right here. What is about to happen next is quite possibly the most chaotic thing to ever happen in the medbay since someone hid Knock Out's buffer. And it starts with the most hilarious statement ever. I don't even know why he said it!**

* * *

_"HADUKEN!" _

_Steve, after saying the random statement, took a random wrench and tossed it at Knock Out's head. The red mech yelped and ducked as Steve banged on the door. "OPEN THE DOOR!" At this statement, bouts of uncontrollable laughter came from the door before Steve double flipped whoever it was off. Knock Out, having recovered from the near hit, growled and picked up his energon prod._

_"You little glitch!" he roared, raising the prod. Steve screeched before running away from the enraged mech. The laughing was even more apparent as Steve started babbling incoherent words in nothing but absolute fear while knocking just about everything over. He grabbed another wrench and hopped onto one of the berths._

_"Stand back! I'm armed, armed I tell you!" he shouted._

_"You don't have the circuitry to_—_AAAAH!" Before Knock Out could finish his sentence, the wrench came flying at him, while Steve raced to the door. Whoever was on the other side finally decided enough was enough and actually opened the door this time. Steve was a purple blur as he raced out of the medbay and into the hallways with a laughing Boltstream and a pissed off Knock Out in his wake._

* * *

**_The backlash of this is was that Steve chased me around the Nemesis for a good three hours. Three hours! Knock Out is still fuming about this. But hey, better Steve than me... Oh, CRAP, HE'S BACK! GOTTA GO, BYE!_**

* * *

Leave a review and tell me what you think of the story. Constructive criticism is appreciated and flames are just ignored. **_  
_**


	2. Energon Goodies

**_Energon Goodies_**

* * *

_"Steve, come on! It's been a week; can't you get over it already?"_

_I continued to give Wayne the silent treatment as we walked to our berthroom. I don't care if it's been a week, a month, or a fragging year; Knock Out already doesn't like me for being so close to the afthole next to me, but said afthole decides to think "I should make it that so Steve is absolutely terrified of walking the halls of the ship, that'll be good for a laugh! HA, HA, HA, HARDY HAR!" When the door opened: I promptly walked to my berth, flopped onto it, and put my back to Wayne._

_"You can't go to sleep mad, __**again**__! That's not how you solve your prob_—_" My servo came up from my side as I mimicked his talking before joining another servo, to mimic me, and started smashing it into the other one._

_"That's real mature, you know. I'm standing face to back to the epitome of maturity over here." Wayne vented heavily before the clunk of pedes against the floor signified him that he was heading to his own berth. _

**_Good. I don't want to hear another one of his lame-brained, stupid aft apologies anyways..._**

_"Real shame. Rumor has it that someone has managed to sneak some __**Energon CANDY **__onto the Nemesis," he stated. I hopped off my berth, tripped over my pedes, fell flat on my visor, and scuttled over to his berth and looked up at him as if he were a god. "Energon Candy? H-here on the ship?" _

_When he nodded, I squealed before covering my mouth and looking back at him and his smug...visor. I looked him up and down, trying to see if there was any indication of his trickster ways hidden in his body language. When I saw none, I gripped his shoulders and shook him back and forth._

_"Where are the goodies?! WHERE ARE THE GOODIES?!" I shouted, shaking him more vigorously. He pushed me off and gripped his helm, possibly dizzy beyond belief, but I don't care at this point. After what he did, he needs to be glad I stopped chasing him every time I saw him..._

_"From what I heard, __**Starscream**__ has them locked real tight in his quarters; heard him bragging about sneaking them onto the ship without Megatron knowing."_

_I kinda stared at him for a bit, contemplating why this fragger was my best friend, when I erupted from my spot on the ground and got into a heroic pose._

_"There are goodies at stake here and we must do everything in our power to obtain them!" I proclaimed, thrusting a servo into the air as Wayne titled his head._

_"Uh...We?" he asked timidly._

_"YOU ALMOST LET KNOCK OUT KILL ME LAST WEEK, YOUR AFT IS HELPING!" I screeched._

_"...Kay," he whispered._

* * *

_My loyal sidekick and I snuck through the Nemesis to not alert any recharging decepticons. I once made that mistake, and trust me, if you think a decepticon is bad when they are fully awake, imagine what they are like when you wake them at three in the morning after tripping over your own pede. But back to the mission!_

_"The only way this plan will work is if you stay ahead of him at all cost," I whispered. _

_"Why am I the one who has to lead him away? Just like with Knock Out, Starscream hates __**me **__for being so close to __**you**__!" he whined._

_"After being randomly pulled into his quarters all the time, I've memorized the layout of his berthroom. Makes it easier to think up escape routes." Wayne nodded and shrugged before we stopped at a corner. I peeked around before trying to roll to the other side, but my wings stopped me in midroll, and I was just stuck with my aft in the air..._

_"...You alright there, buddy?"_

_"Shut up."_

_"...You need some help there, buddy?!"_

_"SHUT UP."_

_Wayne proceed to snicker under his breath as I tried to wiggle onto my back, my side, somewhere that would not have my aft sticking straight in the air! I struggled and grunted as I felt myself tilt slowly to the side before hitting the floor._

_"You could've helped."_

_"I could've, couldn't I?"_

* * *

_Starscream's berthroom loomed before us as Wayne fidgeted on his pedes, scared out of his processor. His wings were facing downward, he was quivering a bit and he was venting heavily. As I was about to knock on the door, he tried to run off, but I grabbed him by his wings and planted his ass on the ground._

_"I can't do this, Steve! You know what happens to my running when I get nervous; he'll catch me for sure!" he whined._

_"You'll be fine! And just think of the candy; that sweet, addictive candy..." I whispered, bringing him close by his shoulders. I gazed off into the distant, remembering the first time I tasted the confection at...__**the academy**__. Wayne looked at me as I inhaled._

_"...You weren't hugged a lot as a sparkling, I can tell." I shoved him away before putting my servo up to knock. I turned to face him before speaking._

_"Operation "Goody Bandits" is a go."_

* * *

**_Thank you for the review, TinyTerror and to all the people that has favorited this story and started following it. I'll try to make the updates as regular as possible, but writer's block and I tend to go hand-in-hand. Enjoy this chapter, and I hope to hear from you all soon._**


	3. Energon Goodies: Conclusion

**_Energon Goodies: Part Two_**

* * *

_Three loud knocks resonated against the door before Wayne and I took off in different directions. As much as it scares me, I know all about Starscream's personality, and one of his quirks is his curiosity. The plan is for Wayne to knock on certain sections of the ship to continue to draw him away from the room while I search for the candy. And we won't get caught because I'll have Soundwave delete that certain section from the security footage. It's the perfect plot! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!_

_I peeked around the corner to see Starscream stick his head out of the door. His optics weren't even open, but he still had that really pissed off expression; imagine the time when Knock Out called him, what was it? "Heir commandant." It's that exact face. ...I had surveillance duty that week with Soundwave, and the __**only reason **__I remember this is because I thought it was funny...and may have had Soundwave help me make a couple of internet memes with it_—_But that is not important right now!_

_Wayne knocking on the walls made him open his optics before turning his head towards the noise. I heard him snort before the sound of retreating heel struts reached my sensors. My servos rubbed together as I chuckled darkly underneath my breath. __**Yes, yes! My brilliant plan is unfurling PERFECTLY!**_

_"Whoever woke me from the most perfect 'Steve Dream' yet will __**beg **__for death by the time I'm finished with them," I heard him grumble._

_ My visor dulled in pure mortal terror, he's had so many dreams about me that he calls them "Steve Dreams"? Now that's what I call a nightmare... I peeked around the corner to see Starscream about to turn into the other hall and got poised to run for his room. Just as he was about to turn, he starts...__**sniffing **__the fragging __**air**__ like a goddamn __**turbofox**__!_

_"I smell Steve." I stumbled as far back from the corner as possible before standing straight, just completely rigid. He has my __**scent**__?! He has my fragging __**scent**__, are you serious?! The heel struts changed direction, and I quickly called Wayne as I rushed down the halls. "Change of plans! __**I'll **__have to distract Starscream while __**you **__look for the goodies! Did you know he has my __**scent**__?!"_

**"I can't go into his berthroom! Do you know what would happen if he caught me in there, because I shudder thinking about it!"**

_"You damn near got me killed last week, man! Get me my __**fucking candy**__!" On that cheerful note, I ended the commlink and blocked him to make sure he didn't call to whine again. I rounded the corner in just enough time to avoid Starscream seeing me, but not to stop pursuing me. __**Wayne, and legs, don't fail me now!**_

* * *

_"Entering Starscream's berthroom and for what? A few pieces of candy?" I muttered to myself._

_I hastily punched in the code to unlock the door before doing a quick look around to make sure no one was watching. With no one in sight, I marched into the lion's den and closed the door behind me. As expected, his room was a lot bigger than our room; he even has his own goddamn bathroom! I keep telling Steve to just give him one kiss, so he'll give __**us **__a personal bathroom, but nooo. Mister "You ever suggest that again, I'll throw you off the fragging ship" had to get all defensive on me... _

_"Now, if I were Starscream, where would I hide my precious candies?" I asked, scratching my helm. Noting his desk on the far side of the room, I quickly approached it and began sifting through the drawers._

_"No."_

_"Nope."_

_"Nu, uh."_

_"WHOA!"_

_One of the bottom drawers had a bunch of Steve pictures in them; one of them even has him when he's asleep for primus sakes! I told his dumb ass that I heard someone in our room two months ago, I __**told him**__! Upon closing the drawer, and trying to push what I saw to the far back of my processor, I was just about to start looking when I heard heel struts coming my way. _

_"Oh no, no, no. Not today, I ain't dying __**today**__," I muttered to myself. Thinking on my feet, I quickly ran into his closet and closed the door just as he entered._

* * *

_"Now, Steve, there's no reason for you to be shy. This isn't the first time you've been in my berthroom." Starscream dragged me into the room as I dug my heels into the floor, trying to catch a seam, a crack, something!_

_"Of course not! The first time was when I had been on my way to the bathroom..." I muttered._

_He had caught up to my clumsy aft after I had tripped over my pedes one too many times and had landed flat on my fragging pedes. Why is it that every time I need my speed the most, __**that **__always happens to me?! Same thing happened the last time when I was chasing Wayne..._

_"Right, that incident was...unfortunate. Let's just get to the matter of why I brought you here." Turning away from me, he made his way to the closet as I frantically looked for a place where he would hide his candy. As he opened the door, __**Wayne **__stiffened up and looked at his surroundings. Luckily, Starscream was rummaging through his desk for something._

_We quickly did our own personal sign language, I instructing him to run into the bathroom, while he cursed me for getting him stuck in this situation in the first place before he ran where I told him to. I turned towards Starscream, and I saw that he had put something behind his back._

_"Cover your visor," he stated. I did as he told and before I knew it, something was shoved against my chest, and I gasped at what I saw. The one thing I've longed for this whole wretched night is within my grasp; __**ENERGON CANDY!**_

_"I heard you and that...__**friend **__of yours talking about how much you enjoyed the confection, and I did have it just tucked away, collecting dust, so I figured it would be a lovely gift," he explained. I wasn't really listening because I didn't really care! It's finally mine! All __**MINE! **__MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!_

**_But, he did go out of his way to give it to me... I'm so gonna regret this later; damn my conscious..._**

_In approximately five seconds-ish; I had put the energon candy in my subspace, spun Starscream around to allow Wayne to leave the room, hugged him and soon joined my friend in becoming a purple blur on a beeline to our room. Once inside, we looked at each other before I started doing a victory...routine. _

_"We did it! We got the candy, __**we got the candy**__!" I said, shaking Wayne before hugging him. He pushed me off before walking to his berth and lying down._

_"Great, fantastic. Can we just eat the stuff and be done with this night?"_

_"..."_

_"Steve? S-Steve, are we gonna eat..." The servo he used to reach out for his share of the candy fell limp as I saw that I had shoved every piece of candy into my mouth. I slowed down on my chewing as he looked at me before slumping to the side after I asked, "What, you wanted some?"_

* * *

**_The ending seems a little...meh, to me... But that's all I've got. Look for the next chapter: "Human games are scary"._**


	4. Human Games Are Scarcy

**_Human Games are Scary_**

* * *

_Wayne and I ran through the hallways of the Nemesis, almost certain that our pedes were sparking at this point. I took a quick look back to see if we were still being pursued, and accidentally tripped over my pede...again...and crashed into Wayne. We tumbled and rolled down a few halls before collapsing in a jumble of arms, legs and, aching helms._

_"How did it come to this, my friend? Running around a primus forsaken warship for our lives...," Wayne spoke wistfully. I could only half-nod since __**his **__aft was currently keeping my helm attached to the floor. Speaking of that... I quickly shrugged him off before rolling my shoulders to make sure they were still attached to my body._

_"Look, all we have to do is keep out of sight and get to that end point," I told him._

_We quickly started sneaking through the halls before hearing the sound of oncoming pedes. After a mini panic-attack, we quickly rushed into the nearest room we could find, and hid behind some old consoles. The door opening and the sound of sniffing informed that one of our pursuer's must've used their tracking abilities._

_"I smell you, Steve! I know you're in here!" Starscream sang._

_My wings started shaking as the approaching heel-struts met my audio receptors. Wayne must've noticed because he inhaled deeply before sighing and putting his servo on my shoulder. "My friend, this is where we part ways," he whispered._

_"What are you-" Before I could finish the sentence, he suddenly pushes me out from the console and tosses a nearby piece of scrap metal at Starscream's helm with a shout of "Viva La Steve!". The metal hit that prong on the top of his helm, and it actually snapped it in half, the part that fell off clunking to the floor... The room fell into a quiet hush, but it's that hush you hear before shit just starts to pop off._

_Starscream's clawed servo slowly reached up and gripped where the top of his prong had been. Wayne slowly slid back down behind the console; and I just scuttled to the door before quickly leaving. As soon as the door closed, all I heard was bangs, clashes, thunks, bams, and Wayne's screams of absolute terror._

_"I will always remember you, Wayne. Even though, you were kinda of an aft at times...," I whimpered. With that, I walked down the hall in an effort to get away from the sound of my best friend being brutally murdered. Not even down the full length of the hall, I just see Wayne past by me as a purple blur running for dear life from the grey blur I assumed was Starscream._

_"I should probably help him, buuuut then I'd lose the game." Just as I was about to walk forward, I feel a tap on my back along with a "You're out" and groan in absolute annoyance before turning to look at the red medic. He clicked his tongue at me before following after the two mechs. __**Looks like it's up to Wayne...**_

* * *

_"Must run faster! Must run faster!"_

_I quickly rounded another corner, only to proceed in slipping on my pedes and landing flat on my helm with a loud "Damn it!" before scuttling back onto my feet. Starscream was closing in on me and I was starting to tire, so I'd better think of something, right? I quickly looked around before noticing a group of other drones._

_"Ah, ha!" I ran as fast as my pedes could go, and effectively rammed all of them to the floor with me. We were all too busy groaning in pain to notice Starscream looking over all of us. Well, they were just too busy to notice... He growled and did that thing with his arms before suddenly getting an evil smirk on his face._

_"You had a good tactic, drone. But all that time spent with Steve has allowed his scent to mingle with yours just slightly enough for me to pinpoint you out," he stated. My intakes locked up on me after he said that; I told Steve those bro hugs would lead to our undoing one way or another!_

_I covered my visor as his claws came in my direction and started praying to Primus for a miracle._

_"Hold it right there, Screamy." __**Knock Out will do... **__The ship's medic strode towards us with an annoyed look on his faceplate. At this point, the other drones just sensed that something was about to happen and just got up and walked off; one actually having the audacity to shoot me a dirty look! The sheer rudeness!_

_"This doesn't concern you, Knock Out!" Starscream stated. He turned his gaze away from me, so I took this time to see just where his claws were. ...They were about two or three inches from my sparkchamber..._

_"We both agreed that I would leave be Stan-"_

_"Steve," Starscream corrected._

_"-whatever, while my soon-to-be berthwarmer-"_

_"Wait, what?!" I asked._

_"-would be unharmed as well!" he stated._

_Starscream growled and took his claws away from my person, which is a good thing because if my systems stayed locked up any longer, I'm afraid I would glitch, and then I'd be really screwed. Soon, they started to get into a heated argument, which meant I started to sneak away._

_I made slow progress, mainly because I kept turning around to see if they were still occupied with their argument every three feet, but I made it to the edge of the hallway and started running to the destination. I broke into a dead set sprint at the loud "Hey" followed by two sets of pedes._

* * *

_"I see Wayne in the distance, Soundwave!"_

_After getting tagged out by Knock Out, I sullenly walked towards where the game would end if Wayne made it, the top of the ship. I had dragged Soundwave with me, you know, like one of those cameras at the end of races, in case it was too close to call for the bare optic._

_But back to Wayne..._

_He was in his jet mode, and I could tell he was absolutely exhausted from the fact that his exhaust pipes were sputtering like one of those vehicles in an old timey cartoon. He was bobbing up and down, and his wings were shaking like crazy._

_"Oh, NOOO!" Starscream and Knock Out were right on his aft in their respective vehicle modes. Knock Out was a fair distance, but Starscream is just almost nose to jet flame with Wayne! My servos gripped my helm as Wayne started to get a little too close to the ground for my liking._

_"Come on, man! You are almost there; think of the consequences!" I shouted, dropping to my knees. My fragging knees! This is how fucking dire the situation at hand is, and I do not need him to get me stuck rooming with Starscream for two months!_

_He gave a quick burst of speed, my encouraging words must having something to do with it, which gave a little bit of a berth between him and Starscream. "Yes!" I cheered, hopping back on my pedes. But my celebration was cut short..._

_Wayne must've thought that the boost would've given him enough thrust to make it to the finish line, but you can guess how that played out. He gave off a small 'oops' before doing a cartoonish drop from where he was in the air and going into complete somersaults._

_"NOOOO!" I screeched, grabbing my helm again._

_Somewhere in the absolute horror, Wayne transformed and was just rolling towards the finish line. I started hyperventilating as Starscream and Knock Out got closer; use your legs, you dumb fuck! It's coming down to the wire, he's slowing down, and a few __**inches **__from the finish line, both mechs transform and pounce on top of Wayne._

_"WHYYYYYYYY?!" I asked, shaking Soundwave by the shoulders. I silently wept on his flat arms as Wayne groaned from the sheer weight of both mechs on top of him and the fact he may lose his virginity today. Starscream got off said mech and dusted himself off before looking at me._

_"Oh, Steeeve~," he sang._

_I screeched and hopped Scooby-doo style into Soundwave's arms as he approached. Wayne was digging his servos into the plating of the ship as Knock Out tried to drag him to the medbay. Soundwave looked up and shook his head before displaying something on his visor. It was a picture of the finish...and Wayne's servo crossing it before they tackled him! Yes!_

_"Impossible!" Starscream stated. Wayne released the plating to throw his arms in the air before hopping onto his pedes and doing a victory dance. Starscream growled at him before brushing past and dragging the crestfallen medic with him. Soundwave looked at the both of us before walking away, shaking his head again._

_"That was a really terrifying experience there, Steve. Ha, ha, ha; let's never do something this stupid again, shall we?" he asked. His voice was quivering, his body was shaking, and the light of his visor kept flickering._

_"Yeah, I can agree to that. But we can still play the game. We just can't make assine bets with Starscream and Knock Out; why the hell did we do that again, exactly?" We both shrugged before making our way back into the ship._

_"So, what do you want to do tomorrow?" I asked. We both paused to think about it._

_"Mario Kart?" I suggested._

_"Mario Kart," he answered._

* * *

**_I am terribly sorry for the long wait on this chapter. I'm going through severe writer's block right now and my head hasn't been exactly on the Transformers Prime fandom. But I may have something else up soon, but we'll see where the idea goes._**

**_Anyways, thank you to all the people that have favorite and followed, I was not expecting so many people to like this retarded story I made. So, R&R_**


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